Artist - Kevin Bloody Wilson
Song   - I Gave Up Wanking
Submitted by: Russell Edwards (russell@ease.com.au)

[D]I give wanking this morning
[G]I never thought that I [D]could
[G]I'm feelin' better [D]already
And this time I'm [A]off it for [D]good

[D]When I first wanked, I's though I's so clever
And [G]all of me mates, they were [D]mugs
[G]Thought I was the first
[D]Bloke here on Earth
[E]Who'd ever played with his [A]slug

[D]It was me own little secret
And [G]I never told any[D]one
And the [G]feelin' I got
The [D]first time I shot
Was like chooks flyin' [A]out o' me [D]bum

I'm [D]givin' up wanking...tomorrow
[G]I never thought that I [D]could
[G]Then I won't get these bad [D]headaches
And then I'll be [A]off it for [D]good

I've [D]wanked in some unlikely places
The [G]shower, the beach and the [D]pool
A [G]dunny, a tram and the [D]pictures
And [E]biology classes at [A]school

And [D]once me grandmother caught me
[G]Wankin' meself in me [D]room
But [G]to her surprise
I [D]just shut me eyes
And imagined her [A]standin' there [D]nude

I'm [D]givin' up wanking...Tuesday
[G]I never thought that I [D]could
And [G]then I won't skwint like I [D]do now
And then I'll be [A]off it for [D]good

Me [D]Dad says it's gonna take willpower
There [G]really is no easy [D]trick
I [G]honestly thought I'd need [D]surgery
To [E]help get me hand off me [A]dick

Me [D]Dad's been a great inspiration
He [G]really has been a great [D]help
He [G]knows what I go through
And [D]just what to do
'Cause he give it up [A]yesterd' him[D]self

So [D]I'm givin' up wanking next Frid'
[G]I never thought that I [D]could
And [G]I'll throw away me thick [D]glasses
And then I'll be [A]off it for [D]good

So if you [D]say you don't wank, you're a liar
And a [G]fool if you say that you [D]do
So [G]next time you see, Prince [D]Charles on TV
Remember he [A]wanks himself [D]too

So [D]I'm givin' up wanking come Christmas
[G]I never thought that I [D]could
And [G]I'll sell me dog and me [D]white cane
And then I'll be [A]off it for [D]good
And [G]I'll throw away me dark [D]glasses
And then I'll be [A]off it for [D]good

[D] [G] [A] [D]